From 393.2--354.8
Let me be clear from the start--this is NOT my resolution for the new year. It's not that I have anything against such resolutions or those who make them. It is just that, in my personal history, resolutions for the new year are never intended to be kept...always intended to be broken, implicitly, from the very start.
This resolution has nothing to do with it no longer being 2008 and it finally being 2009. It has everything to do with my genuine fear that if I did not change my life drastically, I may not make it to see 2010. Here's my story:Anyone who knows me knows that I have struggled with my weight for most of my life. I have experienced drastic swings in weight (I lost 110 pounds in 1997...gained 150 back by early 2005...I lost 115 in 2005 and gained 150 back by late 2008). In '96 I lost the weight for football. In '05 I lost the weight for my wedding. As it turns out, I am able to remain incredibly focused when I have a goal looming over my head. But without such a goal, I all too easily fall off the wagon. I suppose this is part of the reason why I've never been successful with new year resolutions--eventually the new year becomes this year and the luster wears off.
Looking back, neither one of those weight-loss journeys were sustainable. I lost all of the weight in '96 during the summer between my freshman and sophomore years. At the heart of that loss was a strict diet and eight-plus-hour-a-day workouts. This worked fine for a high school kid without a job or other commitments but not for someone living in the real world.In 2005, I lost all of the weight via Weight Watchers--an incredible program with proven results-- but I only ate fat free hotdogs and Subway sandwhiches the entire time (my fault, not WW). As soon as the wedding was over, I said, "Pass the pizza." During that time, I learned how to lose weight on the system but failed to learn the healthy habits and choices that would lead to a healthy lifestyle. I also got prideful and figured that after losing so much weight on the program I didn't need to pay anyone to weigh me...I figured I could do it myself. Without that weekly accountability and community, it wasn't long before my weight and well-being became little more than an after thought and a twinge of guilt after one of my all-day-eat-fests.
A few months ago, I started to notice how terrible I felt ALL of the time. As a large person, I am familiar with being uncomfortable in my body at times but this was different--Constant pain...constant fatigue...constant cyclical hunger/binging/hunger. In all of my life as an overweight individual I have felt bad but never THAT bad. I knew something needed to be done. In early December, I decided to give Weight Watchers another go. Not the counting points and weighing myself at home version--the real deal, face the scale, and do this in community kind of weight watchers. And here's what I found:
The Awful Truth: On Saturday, December 13, 2009 I weighed in at 393.2 lbs. (the largest I have EVER been). Up to that day, I was having night sweats every night (every cause of night sweats is terrifying...especially for a 27 year old), I could no longer wear my wedding ring, none of my clothes fit properly, I was perpetually exhausted, often cranky, and selfish in all of the bad ways of being selfish.
The New Truth: Today, one month and a day later, I weigh in at 354.8 for a total weight loss of 38.4 lbs in 31 days. And I can already tell a major difference! I have not had one night sweat since December 12, 2008. I wear my wedding ring everyday now. I have already dropped a pant size. On Sunday, January 4th, I preached in a suit that hadn't fit properly since last June. I have a lot more energy (in fact, I need to wrap this up so that I can go put in an hour on the treadmill). I'm still probably a little cranky...And I'm finally selfish in all of the good ways of being selfish (taking care of myself first SO THAT I can take care of others).Oh, and I'm also staying ahead of the monotonous monster by setting a goal of preparing a new meal every week, an old favorite every week, and not allowing myself to eat the same meal more than twice in the same week. So far, there is nothing routine about this routine.
Much like with our debt-destroying journey throughout 2008, I will be blogging every month on my progress. My goal weight is 225, so there is a long way to go. But with the wonderful support and encouragement from my lovely bride, a great community like Weight Watchers, and the wonderful friends, family, and fellow-pilgrims at Shreveport First Church of the Nazarene I WILL see this journey through.So, forget about'09. Here's to being around for 2010!!!!
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